27 August 2009
Let the Hypocrite Throw the First Stone
So today my cousin walks into the office and says "How are you?" A nice thing to say, unless your voice is unaudible due to the radio and air vent. I look at her becuase I thought I saw her lips move, but I wasn't expecting anything. I look at her and smile only to be greeted with a sneer and "I said how are you (anger doesn't transfer well over the computer). You ingrone people a lot, and it's rude." As the second sentenced was uttered, I began, "I didn't hear you." She didn't seem to care about my opinion in the matter, I was clearly in the wrong. Well then, to top it all of, she decides to practically ignore me, and be snotty to me all day.
I'm sorry, what right does she have to be the plaintiff's lawer, the judge, jury, and executioner? I was convicted of murder before any of my evidence was in. What right does she have to go from "how are you?" to "that was rude." Isn't there supposed to be a middle ground of a repeat of "how are you?" Maybe not. Maybe, I just like to give people the benifit of the doubt.
Well whatever, forget her, but for some reason I feel like my family has been slowly disowning me. Now it feels like all we have in common is our last name. Sometimes I wonder if my uncles dissowned my Mom along time ago because of the whole wedlock thing. What I really need from my family is some sign that they care that I exist. I don't see my Dad's side enough to really care what they think, but I practically live in the same house as my Mom's family. There are so many of us. So I wonder, would they care if I dissappeared? Sure they would look for me, but would they have the heart to keep going, care enought to go national. Maybe I'm over reacting, maybe I'm not, but I feel like I'll be the person who doesn't spend Christmas and other holidays with my family. Sometimes I hate myself for it, but then again my cousins justify it sometimes, too.

for now
For Now @ 10:34 PM